I know I will regret saying this in 10-15 years (or sooner), but I already feel old at 27. I know that it isn’t old in the grand scheme of things, but last Friday was a blow and I saw it coming.
This morning (after a surprise text message that Ian was at the airport 15 minutes away, with an hour to kill before heading to Afghanistan, a race to get dressed and head out the door, and then another text as I was parking the car that said they were calling him to get on the plane, approximately 30 seconds of well-wishes and good-lucks), I got a head start on my day. Today was so busy that it felt surreal (I’m still not sure I didn’t dream the airport sequence). I generally keep my days off pretty low-key.
First, a trip to the DMV to renew the license that expired last Friday. Then, a trip home to get the proof of citizenship I’d forgotten in my rush out the door to get to the airport. Nate still hadn’t left for work yet, so I gave him a ride and went back to the DMV. I still don’t understand why people in this town complain about the lines there. I stood in line for almost an hour to get anything done at the DMV in Iowa. Here you don’t even have to stand, as you select from a touch-screen what you’re there for (plates, license, road test, etc), take a ticket, and sit down. Less than 5 minutes later, your number is called and you get on your way. You don’t even NEED chairs as efficiently as that place is run. And I would have liked to have gotten more of my book read, but that wasn’t meant to be.
The next stop was Staples, because I never have envelopes when I need them. I bought the smallest, cheapest package I could find, since I knew I’d lose them before I needed them again. I suppose this means I should be more organized, but it doesn’t mean I’m going to actually do it. The truth is, I use envelopes even less often than I write checks, and now that I don’t pay rent, that comes out to approximately 5 times a year. Checks (and envelopes) are for luddites. The envelope was purchased for mailing my tax return, so who knows when I’ll actually see any money back. I am expecting a hefty refund with the First Time Homebuyer Credit, but that credit required a mailed-in return, and the estimate I heard last was 5-6 months. Hopefully not, but I have very little faith in bureaucracy.
I have a job interview tomorrow, and I decided that I should probably wear something besides the scrubs I will be wearing to work before and after it. Went to Fashion Bug and got a $45 dollar outfit for $12.50, since someone forgot to take the sale that ended yesterday out of the register computer. Or something. I don’t know. I just know it was awesome that I didn’t have to spend a lot of money on it, because I won’t feel bad now if I don’t get the job, and I also hate spending money on clothes that (I hope) won’t fit in a little while.
After the shopping trip (which took an hour, because I am indecisive and a slow clothes-changer), I went to the gym to meet with a trainer. We set out a program for me, and I plan on going every other day. It’s hard for me to stick to things, but I have unlimited guest privileges with this account, so I am pretty sure I can wrangle someone into going with me, which will help. Kaity went with me last night and we spent 40 minutes on the treadmill together and it went by so fast! Never would have thought it could go that fast, so obviously there’s my motivation right there. I am attacking my laziness with “thinspiration” from as many angles I can come up with.
- I’d love to look like Crystal Renn. Maybe toner than her, but not any skinnier necessarily. Right now I have a huge gut that I hate, among other body failures.
- I’d love to get married in a mermaid-cut dress, but you’ve got to have the figure to go with it. Mostly I want to get married and not hate the pictures that came from it.
- I’d love to be a single-digit size again. Just listening to Kaity get excited about shopping and needing a size 4 jeans makes me want to go outside and run.
- I want Nate to be proud of me. I want him to see results from me, and not just more disappointing unfinished goals. Also he is hot and deserves a hot girlfriend.
- I want to have a baby, and I don’t want to be a fatass mom. Besides sparing any future children from “fat mama” jokes, I know I’m going to have to be physically stronger and leaner in order to even get pregnant or push a baby out. Extra pounds = insulin problems = sad ovaries, to put it very, very simply. I’m hoping to reverse any problems I’m having with PCOS by losing weight.
Tonight I was supposed to make pot roast, but I haven’t even started it yet. I think I’ll just get everything ready and put it in the oven when I get home from work tomorrow. Tonight will have to be leftovers.